Countdown to NaNoWriMo

Posted: October 31, 2011 | Author: | Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: | Leave a comment »

There’s nothing like 50,000 words to help one focus. And a BFO deadline helps too…

No, no, I’m not having doubts.

Nope.

In less than an hour the calendar clicks over to November and the starting line for a massive endurance event.

Writing every day for 30 days, thousands of crazed authors around the world will bash out their first draft of a novel. I’ll be in there, somewhere. Maybe at the back…

www.nanowrimo.org

Gulp!

Cure found for other people’s homework

Posted: October 22, 2011 | Author: | Filed under: Bullies, My favourite complaint letters | Leave a comment »

 Just say no  send an invoice!

 

CASE STUDY

Problem: Pestering emails

Cause: Hopeless Manager at old work needs help (woopsie) but is too chicken to ask.

Symptoms: Friends working there are asked to contact (wisely refused). Now Newbie has been assigned the task of asking, ever so politely. How can you say no?

Then there are emails, following-up, reminding, nudging, vaguely frustrated. Clearly it’s not Newbie’s fault. But there are other things on the to-do list. Many, many other things. Dental visits. Cleaning the scary cupboard under the laundry sink. Organising favourite t-shirts alphabetically by slogan.

Fix: Set a pay rate for your time.

Deployment: An invoice, quoting rate, minimum hours (a discount if you’re feeling generous). This lets Newbie give the problem back to Hopeless who should do his own homework or explain the expenses. Newbie gets on with life.

Result: Pestering stops. Instantly. Ah the serenity!

 

 

Dear real estate agent

Posted: June 8, 2011 | Author: | Filed under: My favourite complaint letters | Tags: , , , , | Leave a comment »

[I had to hang up on this woman before I said something very unkind]

Anna,

As explained in my previous email, I proactively made myself available for an inspection this saturday with an 1.5hr window. Rental inspections seem most popular in the mornings, so this was an assumption on my part. It’s also the only time that works for me, as I have now made plans for the long weekend.
It is not my fault that you have other tasks on of a Saturday morning, of which I was not aware. Had you explained to me last week that you would be seeking only afternoons from now on, that would have been helpful. I also explained I was sick last week. I’m quite sure I do not need to tend a doctor’s certificate.
And as for whether “I care” about the owner’s position, this actually shocked me. Were you a primary school teacher once? Or is it about making me feel guilty somehow? Really, does that ever work with other people? Personally, I’ve always found being polite so much more effective in any transaction.
The lecture on the phone was quite unnecessary. Obviously we all have bad days, and I can only assume yours has not been the best. I’d prefer a written response from now on. I’m sure you will prefer that too.
I hope your day gets better.

So what are the fees like in Hell?

Posted: March 1, 2011 | Author: | Filed under: My favourite complaint letters | Leave a comment »

Banks are evil, get it? Just try typing in www.bankofsatan.com into your browser. BSB # 666, of course.

Abandoned… soon.

Posted: February 22, 2011 | Author: | Filed under: My favourite complaint letters, westpac, WorstPack | Tags: , , | Leave a comment »

Something amazing happened today. As was promised, I received an update from WorstPack Westpac. Even more incredible, there was good news to be had. The special agent assigned to my case said the bank is set to ‘abandon’ the issue and that the paper trail will take a couple of weeks to clear.

Upon reflection (now that I am off deadline) I believe this means that violent alarms and sirens will no longer sound when someone at the bank manages to type my surname correctly (it is after all, undeniably difficult to spell).

I’m told to expect a letter of confirmation when the process is complete. I’m thinking of framing it, if and when it arrives.

That is, of course, assuming the matter finally ends there. Will it?

I wonder, how exactly does one go about checking their paper trail/ credit rating/ special agent  secret squirrel bank file for themselves?

I wonder if there’s a post-it on the file. Something akin to morbid curiosity has me wondering what the scribble might say.

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